my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
