I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
You should frame my arrest warrant.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
