hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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