no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
