Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Randomize