he wants to bone in the snuggie
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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