I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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