so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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