Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Randomize
