I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
