what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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