Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
