He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
