she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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