All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
