I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
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