The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
