is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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