I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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