Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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