Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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