Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
