great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize