Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize