I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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