K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
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