At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
it hurts more in the daytime
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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