and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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