You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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