i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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