Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
