i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
