omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Randomize
