party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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