I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
