where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
