he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
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