But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Randomize
