Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Randomize