I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
