Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
