we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
