the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I think your dad took our porno
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
