ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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