No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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