i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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