shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
