She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize