That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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