We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
high people should be assigned attendants
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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