I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Randomize
