ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
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