The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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